The Joys of Womanhood

So a couple months back, I did a 30 day trial of vegetarianism. I did it in hopes of losing some weight. The first two weeks were exciting, I lost 2 pounds each week. Then after that, I gained it back. During this time I ate a lot of Boca burgers. I learned something, Boca burgers have estrogen. I’m not sure if it’s added or just natural from the soy. So all this extra estrogen, I had a really heavy period during this time. The next couple were really light as I didn’t have that estrogen to boost anymore. Without even thinking, I started eating the Boca burgers again. We had them, they needed to be eaten, I ate them.  I just happened to eat them when I was on one of those really super light periods. This caused my period to last 2 weeks. TWO FRICKING WEEKS!#$@)$%#!%&#$()@%  My period had started on a Saturday and was super light. The following Friday, it got super heavy and lasted another week.

This scared me. Just in the way that, omg did boca burgers f’ me up completely? Will I ever have a normal period again without having to take estrogen? Did my body get lazy and just say hey sweet I don’t have to do this for myself anymore?

Then I got my current period. And it is completely normal! Yay. When I started I expected it to do what seemed to become the norm, and super light. Like it was so light, nothing ever came out onto underwear or pad. So after work, I went to the gym. When I was done my underwears were bloody, good thing I was wearing red shorts.

Which reminds me of when I was probably 12 or so and just starting to get periods. I had gone to the open house at the local college and was helping out with some animals. So most of the day I was straddling this hay bail. I got there probably about 7am. About noonish I went to the bathroom, and realized I started my period and the crotch was completely red. I had been sitting with my legs wide open all morning. I was wearing white sweats. I didn’t have any money on me to get a pad. I asked my friends little brother to borrow 50 cents. He was like “oh you want to get a tattoo” or some other stupid little thing. I just kinda grinned, oh yea of course. So I put a pad in, tied my sweatshirt around my waist and kept my legs closed the rest of the day.